Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Self Talk Follow up--What Do We Do With This?

In regards to the previous lettergram I sent out on "Self Talk", I have had a number of requests to go further with this topic. Primarily this has to do with more of the "How To" when we talk to our self so we will keep this light and airy. Oh-before going any further I need to make a correction about a reference to an author's name in my last mailing. Terry Cole-Whittaker is the author of "What You Think Of Me Is None Of My Business", not Elizabeth Kirpatrick.
So much of our day to day interactions with others can be divided into two categories; contamination and contribution. When inner conflict shows up as outer turmoil, the result is generally contamination between people. Ill feelings obviously happen and then a falling out takes place. Thoughts we have which we can label "toxic" are going to adversely affect the relationship we have with others.
So how do we make sure we are contributing to our own mental well-being, when extended to others will form healthier unions? Let's recognize that there are different levels of thinking which create more effective styles of communicating. If more of our thoughts are negatively charged, much of what we, as well as others will hear us make statements like, "I can't-don't, I wish, could, should and if only. These are extremely self limiting and self defeating. No One deserves a plan which is geared for failure.
The next form of destructive self talk involves watered down self intentions for "wanting" to be different, however it just doesn't happen. Hearing words such as "could have, would have, should have" will more often show some intent but not very deliberate convictions. We must be more diligent of what we hear and what others hear us say.
What we all want is a solid plan for success and being totally committed to a healthier process of communicating. We will create this by listening to what we are "thinking" about and then speaking it. We continue to contribute to everyone concerned by paying strict attention to our thoughts.
Now we knock the "T's" out of can't, won't and don't. We will speak in terms of can, will and do! We become more action oriented about being committed to change. Just with this minor shift in our behavioral thinking will begin to program our mind and attitude toward more positive expressions. Your brains' conscious and subconscious wiring only knows what you teach it. These proactive methods of thinking will begin shifting your conscious awareness, taking you in the direction you want to go, becoming the person you want to be to others and yourself.
I hope this has shed some light on ways we can daily begin elevating the lives of all concerned.
Thank you again for all the support.