Friday, January 9, 2009

Making The Best Decisions Anyway

Many times we are confronted with either people or situations which require some thinking or movement on our side. Sometimes we fret and complain about them and sometimes we naturally resist knowing full well a change of heart or direction is required. Resisting takes a tremendous amount of energy and in the final analysis we "generally" will do what is best for all--but not always. People will have a tendency to want to roll over you like a steamroller just to get their way. Sometimes you will realize what is happening and sometimes you won't. Life will come at you in ways which will have you be questioning your better judgement about making decisions. In light of all of these scenarios, I came across this anonymous passage and thought that it spoke very clearly to how and who we need to be.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of having an ulterior motive or being selfish---be kind anyways.
What you spend a year building, some people may try to destroy overnight--build anyway.
If you sre honest and frank, people will try to cheat you-be honest and frank anyway.
If you give the world the best you have and it may never be enough--give the world your best anyway.
If you find serentity and happiness--people willl be jealous--be happy anyway.
In the final analysis it is between you and God--it was never between you and them anyway.
The good you do today people will often forget tomorrow--but do good anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and true enemies--but succeed anyways.

With the start of the new year, many of us search for different ways of doing and becoming. Having a mental shift about some of the above mentioned areas of growing can bring change, peace, calm, control and a new focus for success. And remembeer--we cannot spell "success" without "U".

Friday, January 2, 2009

Developing Skills and Reducing Anxiety at Work

When we think of any job setting and the people who are responsible for its success, often we are confronted with very difficult personalities. When we ask the obvious question, "How in the world did that person ever get hired in their position?" We know that on the day of their hire, they placed their best foot forward to mask any potential problem of not getting this job. Once they become on staff, a quite insidious process begins happening. We begin to become negative about maybe the job, then the boss-manager-supervisor because they were not present on the day you were interviewed. Had they been, there is a possibility you might have detected an air of sarcasm, control, conflict, criticism etc, many of which help to torpedo your functionality and performance at work. And guess what? All of what happens during the day has a direct impact on your relationships, family and your emotional and physiological health. So by getting aligned with your career we are referring to the ways in which you handle conflict, disagreeable people, pushy or demeaning/controlling bosses--all of which can set you up for failure. We all have a certain way of tolerating things or people for just so long and then it comes time to retaliate. Generally we do this by stuffing alot until we are not able to and then we react. Usually that is negative and will come back to bite us. If you are in the career you really enjoy and you have people who make it so difficult daily, then we need to learn some skills to get them to back off. Wouldn't it be a shame if you were asked to leave a job that you really enjoyed doing however had a problem engaging difficult associate workers? Determine what it is that is the problem between you and the other person and then get to talking about how you can respond not react to the person and the nature of the conflict. Invest your time into the "what" is happening between you all not placing so much energy into the "who" of the arguement. That way you protect the security of your position at your place of employment and displays your ability to have workable skills to navigate through a dilemma. That is something which really pleases the folks in management positions. Good luck as 2009 gets underway and if any of these situations may be in need of repairing, address them openly with the other worker affected by this.